Sigh. Where to start?
I’ve been in a writing funk ever since my #YesAllWomen post.
The writing of the article itself was easy. The aftermath however, was something entirely different to easy.
I’ve lived with the experiences that I wrote about my whole life, so each individual incident was terrible, but ultimately bearable.
It was only after I’d sat down to compile these happenings into a list, a very edited list (meaning, there were more), that I got mad. Really, really mad.
The pain, shame, injustice, vulnerability and helplessness of those collective incidents all formed a snowball, knocking me off my feet.
It wasn’t a drastic knock, it wasn’t a slump into depression, it was just a, ‘I’ve got nothing left to give, no creativity left’ knock.
And I’m ok with it…now.
I’ve missed writing and I’ve missed connecting with you guys, but I didn’t want it to be forced, to be fake.
I still don’t know how long this will last, but the downtime has provided a beautiful and unexpected journey of self-discovery.
We don’t watch TV, no really, we don’t, not at all, and no, not even online, not even the kids (their choice) that’s a whole post in itself! But I have spent the last month watching The Lord Of The Rings Trilogy, The Hobbit films, and just last night The Lion The Witch and the Wardrobe, all for the first time.
Yes I know, I’m WAY behind the times, though I prefer to think of myself as a ‘reverse hipster’, yep new phrase, you heard it here it first folks….which would make me an actual hipster, not a reverse one, completely contradicting my new coined phraseology! Welcome, welcome to my brain. You may need to find a handrail, it gets mighty bumpy in here, lots of turbulence.
When I was growing up, I wasn’t allowed to read the Narnia books, I was told they were ‘evil’, as they contained a witch.
I was discouraged from reading any fiction, but especially fantasy.
The only books we had around our home were bible commentaries, ministry style reads, or religious auto-biographies.
I don’t condemn this parental choice, we all do the best with the tools we have at the time, and I recognise these restrictions were spawned out of a desire to ‘protect’ me spiritually. So I share here, not out of disrespect, but merely to give you insight into where/how my thinking formed.
My view was that fiction and fantasy were for the geeks, the spiritually naive or those with intellects far superior to my own.
I caught the reading bug at age 19, when my firstborn was a teeny bubba.
Since then my Dad and I have bonded over our shared love of reading, as he introduced me to a whole world of wonderfulness!
It has brought us together and been a strengthening tool that has helped re-build our relationship.
Still, I never ventured far into the land of fantasy.
So when my son, Sir J came home from school, not only reading but engrossed in The Hobbit, and begging to see all the movies, Jordan and I agreed and decided it was our parental onus (and I truly thought of it as such) to watch them with him….
Me oh my, how wrong was I?
I can’t explain what has happened to my soul through these films…I feel alive!
I have been immersed in a world and language filled with adventure and discovery.
My only regret is that I didn’t read the books first.
I feel like something has been unleashed inside me, I have been exposed to a beauty that I knew not existed, and now that I’ve tasted it, I want more, more, MORE!
The passion I have for my Saviour and the Heart of My Father God, has also been fueled in a new and fresh way.
Watching these battles between good and evil, seeing with my flesh-eyes the war between darkness and light and knowing how much more ferociously than this, our Creator fights for us, has stirred the fire in my belly in a whole new way!
The older I become, grow and discover, the more I recognise myself as an incomplete puzzle template. There are distinct pieces missing, but as I move forward into my authentic created self, the puzzle pieces are being handed to me. I’m on a journey to puzzle completedness.
Each piece is a gift, a revelation, an awakening!
This new form of literature, which isn’t really literature to me yet, as I’ve only watched movies, not read the books themselves (hold the handrail), is another piece of that puzzle!
So please, educate me, clearly I need it!
Tell me what I’ve been missing out on!
What do I need to read?
I’m open to all genre recommendations… Through no romance please, uggghhh, gag!
Who are the ‘greats’?
And what books have stirred you, and propelled you in your journey, whatever that may look like?